Facial Hair.

I am descended from darker skinned people – we think Greek and we know Native American. I’ve had a moustache for as long as I can remember. When I was 13 one of the boys in our street pointed it out (thanks Lyndsay Adkins ) and I promptly went home and shaved it off. As you do. Mum had the same thing, as did my Nana. Mum and I have an agreement. When I see that she has let her facial hair grow and is nurturing a beard, we’re having her put down, because clearly, in her own words ‘I’ll obviously be off my head.’

My Dad is hairy, my brother is hairy – I’m basically screwed whichever way you look at the genetics.

We’re hairy. What can I tell ya? I’ll tell you one thing. I’m not going to be embarrassed about it. I personally don’t want to resemble the lovely chap above so I take care of it, but I’m not embarrassed at all about having facial hair. FFS what ELSE are we supposed to be ’embarrassed’ about.

After another report in another paper today about facial hair – I mean GOD FORBID we aren’t completely bald – but whatevs: I thought a quick ‘Best way to rid yourself of it depending on the area’ may help.

Eyebrow – thread or pluck. Waxing stretches the skin – take it from me, at some point your upper lid falls down. Don’t encourage it.

Mustache – thread, wax, bleach (not if you’re dark skinned), depilatory creams (burn ’em off) or shave (my preference, and no it doesn’t grow back much thicker and denser – mine’s 90% gone on a permanent basis)

Nasal – scissors (inside), pluck (outside)

Chin – pluck or thread. Waxing isn’t quite strong enough for these hairs. They’re like tree trunks. Especially the other side of 40. Sorry girls.

Excessive hair on face due to conditions such as PCOS – threading is easiest to manage, you don’t want to be bleaching that amount of skin. And waxing can lead to ingrown hairs and irritation. Laser is a good long-term option but takes patience, and bear in mind it doesn’t work as well on really dark skin.

Of course there are other options. Electrolysis – too painful and time-consuming for me (and WHO can be bothered?), laser in salons – pricey, IPL – triggers killer headaches for me and again pricey and home laser kits. All yours for the taking.
I’m too much of a wimp for electrolysis. And the home laser kits are just as good as the salon ones for taches/chins etc in my opinion. I’m playing with one at the minute and will report back in due course.

I am still plucking, shaving and lasering – depending on the area. My Grandad’s mantra was ‘testicles, spectacles, wallet and watch’. Mine is ‘tweezers, razor, toothbrush, toothpaste’.

In the meantime, my name is Caroline. I have a razor and I’m not afraid to use it.