The Vulva Skincare Scam

What’s going on?

I’m surprised I’ve mustered the tolerance to get through over 1,000 words on this topic, but here we are, and in the interests of putting a mallet through yet another layer of female bodily shame, I’m here for it. 

Skincare for Down There has been gaining traction for a number of years, and under the shady guise of 'empowerment' has co-opted beauty ingredients and language into its grasp. I am really tired of marketers playing on the insecurities of women to sell more crap you don’t need, I mean would men EVER consider spending hundreds of pounds to brighten their bellend or apply anti-ageing serum to their crumpled scrotums? NO. 

Now, I know I’m not of a generation that ‘sends nudes’ as casually as texts, but I’m pretty damn sure that no partner worth having would ever want a vulva any other way than nature intended. For Christ’s sake, unless you’re a gynaecologist or delivering my baby, get your brand away from my vulva.. 

What are these brands selling?

Most are just selling you more insecurity. More reasons to loathe another bit of yourself by thinking it needs ‘fixing’ in some way. Just to be clear here: no vulva needs a 'routine'. It doesn’t need brightening, exfoliating, perfuming, or a hydrating vulva sheet mask (yep, they really do exist). Yes there are sometimes vulva-related issues that could benefit from some of skincare’s calming/moisturising ingredients, but in general, gentle soap and water will suffice for cleansing and for moisturisation (i.e for menopausal dryness) a good, simple, fragrance-free emollient will do just as good a job as some fancy new ‘intimate’ moisturiser with an insultingly hefty price tag. Beyond that, any persistent issues should be dealt with by your GP or gynaecologist.

What product types are in these ranges ?

Literally anything you would normally use for facial skincare has now travelled south; it’s insanity. Unless you have recently given birth (in which case there are some welcome products that can soothe swelling and inflammation), you should just be cleaning your vulva with gentle pH balanced, fragrance-free washes. Hygiene is of course important (the vagina itself is self-cleaning but the vulva is not), but this basic cleansing should not be confused with the industry’s attempt to make us feel that our labia are in need of radiance or ‘renewal’. This sends women a terrible message that vulvas somehow need to smell like a Peach Melba or be subjected to the same scrutiny as our faces. 

Foy, for example, tells us that “V love is self love” and that its innovative Puissance Vulva Serum helps improve “hydration, brightness, and overall wellbeing of your vulva”. “Wellbeing” of your vulva? What next, send it on its own yoga retreat and feed it Kimchi? Apparently, you can repeat the application of this luxurious serum onto your vulva any time “you wish to awaken the divine feminine”. Wankers.

Oh, and one final gut punch: there are THIRTY SEVEN ingredients in the INCI list. 

It gets worse.

It pains me to think that much of the obsession with how our most intimate parts look is driven by porn and the unrealistic images of what women ‘should’ look like. The shocking rise in labia surgery (driven mainly by young women I might add) is testament to this. An entire beauty category dedicated to ‘perfecting’ it perpetuates this idea, yet the biggest beauty retailers are weighing in on the V-care boom: Sephora, Feelunique and Cult Beauty all stock dedicated products and brands.  From Dr Barbara Sturm’s  V Drops (yes, they have Pre-and-Probiotics to support the microbiome but they are £80 and a good diet will do that for nothing) to oils, deodorants, washes, wipes and sprays, the normalisation of  potions for your privates is everywhere. 

Not only does your vulva ‘need’ specialised cleansers and wellbeing products, it can now enjoy an anti-ageing routine too! The Rosebud Kit by Singapore brand TWO (|) LIPS  (yes, really) contains 3 products—Pout (a hyaluronic serum for £105/30ml), De-crease ( an anti-ageing antioxidant £69/30ml) and Sleepover (a repairing overnight mask £55/50ml).

If that’s not tempting you, then how about their ‘Blackout’ vulva charcoal mask ( £16 each) — the "world’s first activated charcoal vulva mask designed to detoxify, soothe, and brighten sensitive skin" or ILLUM’s Pink Blossom Intimate Area Brightening Treatment? Allegedly “your trusted solution for lighter, brighter intimate areas” it will give your skin the “perfect plump finish  and repair and restore tired skin”. Or perhaps KYSH’s Hydralift Collagen Mask “enriched with collagen and hyaluronic acid, to hydrate, plump and rejuvenate the area of the mons pubis and the labia majora”.

Wankers.

So what do I need?

Our vulva microbiome is a delicate ecosystem, and women have been doing just fine leaving their fragile nethers alone for centuries. For most people, a healthy microbiome thrives with minimal intervention and it mostly maintains itself. However, it can be disrupted by sex, periods, overwashing and hormonal changes, which typically show up as redness, itching, irritation and dryness. For example, periods bring a change of pH in the vulva, and menopause can cause dryness, so it’s a good idea to use low pH washes and avoid irritants such as essential oils and fragranced bubble baths. Mess around with too many products down there and it's a recipe for irritation—a simple cleanser and emollient for dryness (if required) is all you need.

Supporting your vulva

There are myriad things you can do to support a healthy vulva environment, and most of them are good old-fashioned common sense:

Basic hygiene – Gentle washing with just warm water or a mild, unscented cleanser on the external vulva (not inside) is enough. A healthy vaginal pH is between 3.8 and 4.5, so your best bet is to look for a product within the same range. 
A balanced diet – Staying hydrated and having a good diet including Probiotic foods such as yoghurt, kefir, miso, tempeh and Kombucha will help support good bacteria.
Manage Moisture – Tight, synthetic fabrics all encourage moisture build up, so try to wear cotton underwear and always change out of sweaty gym clothes to prevent bacteria and manage moisture.
Avoid irritants – The vulva is very delicate. No harsh soaps or washes, and nothing with a high pH. Alkaline products with a pH greater than 7 can lead to the overgrowth of yeast and other unwanted bacteria.
Fragrance Free - Anything scented has the potential to irritate, but more worryingly, perfume can cover up odours that need to be addressed by an OB/GYN. A new odour is the body telling you something is wrong and you need to get it checked out. Covering it up can delay you getting proper medical treatment.
Don’t douche - Douching can wash out the ‘good’ bacteria which are essential for vaginal health, disrupt the natural pH and increase risk of infections.

Look, if you want to use separate V-products then that’s your choice; my only advice would be to keep it super-simple and try to find products that have the backing of experts in vaginal health.  I would still argue their place in the beauty aisle but at least you have some reassurance of expertise in this area. Look at the back of the packaging or brand website and check if the product has been tested under gynaecological supervision. DEODOC for example was developed by sisters Dr. Hedieh Asadi and Hasti Asadi along with Professor of Obstetrics and Gynaecology, Dr. Gunvor Ekman Ordeberg, and was the first intimate care brand founded and run by women doctors. 

Cleansers 

There is an abundance of washes available with the right pH of between 3.8-5. Wipes and sprays—although unnecessary—can help you feel fresh if on the move, without water, or (god forbid) camping. Here are some sound options, depending on whether you want a wash, bar or spray.

• Love Wellness pH Balanced Vulva Cleanser — OB/GYN-developed, this cleanser formula is clinically proven to not disrupt healthy vaginal pH levels with use.†
  
• Gallinée Perfume-Free Cleansing Bar – A gynaecologically tested soap-free formula that’s recommended for atopic skin and babies, it gently cleanses, soothes, protects, and  respects your natural balance. Like all Gallinée products, the perfume-free bar contains prebiotics that nourish the beneficial bacteria, and is rich in lactic acid to support your vaginal microbiome.
• DEODOC Meno Care Oil Wash —A gentle, yet hydrating oil wash cleanse without stripping the vulva’s natural microbiome. Formulated with 100% plant based oils such as Avocado and Chamomile it naturally replenishes oils on the skin barrier and helps retain moisture.
• WooWoo Soothe it! Chamomile & Aloe Vera Intimate Wipes — These pH balanced biodegradable wipes from WooWoo are ideal for freshening up when water is scant. Made from plant cellulose, these unscented wipes are 100% plastic free, flushable and cost less than a cuppa.
• Luna Daily The Hydrating Everywhere Spray-To-Wipe — An ultra-hydrating, full body instant cleansing ‘eco-wipe’ (one bottle of this spray is equivalent to 300 single-use wipes), Luna Daily’s handy spray has been developed with dermatologists and gynaecologists, is pH balanced, and includes prebiotic lactic acid, inulin and vitamins to support the skin barrier and protect your microbiome. 

Moisturisers

• Replens MD Vaginal Moisturiser — A doctor recommended, long-lasting vaginal moisturiser. Formulated with a unique bio-adhesive technology that allows it to attach to dry cells, it delivers continuous moisture to combat vaginal dryness.
• Stripes Vag of Honor Intimate Hydrating Treatment — This fragrance free gel-based hydrator is infused with a powerful blend of plant-based ingredients including ectoine, hyaluronic acid, and glycogen to provide relief from dryness, itching and discomfort whilst fortifying the skin barrier.
• Medicine Mama's Vmagic Vulva Balm – Founded by Dr. Clare Bertucio and OB/GYN approved, this balm is made with organic ingredients such as olive oil and beeswax to deliver gentle hydration. 
• Rael Soothing Vulva Relief Gel —A light, soothing gel that acts as a protective barrier, calms itching and balances pH levels for long-lasting comfort.

A final word of caution: please always check the formulation of all products for latex condom compatibility, especially oil-based formulas which will break down latex.

Words by Caroline Hirons, Skin Rocks Founder and Skincare Expert